Kitties & Allies

Shedding season is in full swing, my furry brothers and sisters. I love running through the morning sunbeams, high on catnip, leaving a fin mist of hair behind me as I do battle with the toy mouse. The only downside to this is that the scary vacuum cleaner seems to emerge more often during this season.

Last weekend Evan had his friend Andrew over for an epic game of "Axis & Allies." I'm not sure how they play this game, but for me, it's a great opportunity to jump up onto the table in the office room and bat lots of little pieces. It seriously reduces the epicness of the game when I can just jump up and disrupt the military forces of the entire world with a swipe of my paw. I do like taunting the players in that manner.

Speaking of visitors, the funniest thing happened yesterday. A dog came around to visit the house. A very funny looking mutt. I believe Evan and Sudha had the strange notion that they might adopt a dog. If they had just consulted me I could have told them the folly of doing so, but they didn't. I knew something was up when they closed up upstairs in the laundry room. They then let me out and I trotted downstairs just as usual to find the dog in my hallway! I went up to the dog and sniffed at its face. Sudha and Evan both act pretty surprised. I'm not sure why, the dog seemed pretty cowardly. I did arch my back and puff out my tail just to make sure that the intruder knew her place.

After this initial meeting, I then stayed 3-4 feet from the dog at all times. She seemed more scared of me than I was of her, honestly, I started chasing her around and hurling insults.

In the end though, my humans decided not to keep the dog. It was sad, because they seemed to like her, and I admit it was quite entertaining to chase her around. But I think they made the right decision, they've got a lot of things going on right now.

They both seemed much more eager to pet and cuddle me yesterday after the interlude with the dog, so I'm not complaining. I spent the remainder of yesterday afternoon and evening sitting by the back door. At one point I did jump up and hang from the screen door again.

Anyway, Evan, who usually transcribes my blog posts here for me, will out of town for about 10 days starting in a couple of weeks, so my next post may be even more delayed than usual. Evan's mother is unfortunately going through chemotherapy right now, and he is going to Switzerland (wherever that is) to help her out. Please keep her in your thoughts!

Until next time my furry brothers and sisters.

Wide Open Windows

Just two nights ago, my furry brothers and sisters, my humans opened the windows in the house for the first time this year. This is a most glorious occasion, the sites and smells and sounds that come from outside are quite amazing. I have celebrated this momentous happening by starting to jump up onto and climb in the screen door.  I'd never thought to do this before, and I must say it was very rewarding. Evan and Sudha were quite surprised to see me 4 feet off the ground hanging from the screen, but they'll get over it.

There is unfortunately a downside to the open-windows season: fans. In case you don't know what a fan is, it is some sort of infernal demon that blows air at me and makes me very uncomfortable. Evan even took it upon himself to deliberately point the thing at me. I took revenge by pouncing on his feet at 6 am this morning.

My humans are travelling quite a bit recently. They were out for four days, and are apparently leaving me alone for another four days this weekend. The kindly neighbor came by to feed me, and when I say feed, I mean feed. He was VERY generous with the food. So much so that when Evan and Sudha got back they took one look at me and started calling me "tubs." Needless to say, they have put me back on the infernal diet. Now I eat my food almost right away and then start complaining for more.

It's a good thing they are going away this weekend again and the nice neighbor will feed me an appropriate amount.

Going back to the subject of the outdoors: I've been making more concerted efforts to escape recently than I have in the past. Just the other day, in fact, I got out onto the front porch, and almost manage to hide under the bushes before Evan grabbed me. Any time the back door slides open, I'm there, pushing to get out. I've not yet managed to get passed the back deck yet, but I will someday!

I've heard talk recently about how cats are able to know who's allergic to them, or who is afraid of them while looking at a room full of humans. I will take this moment to say that that is absolutely true. Evan and Sudha's friend Jonathan has been coming over to watch "A Game of Thrones," and he is quite allergic to cats. We just have a sixth sense about these kinds of things. So I made extra sure to be friendly to him, to console him to my presence. I sat near his spot on the couch, I rubbed my body against his legs a few time. I really just wanted to make sure he was not afraid of me any more.

It's been nice here in Minnesota since Spring finally arrived a couple of weeks ago. I predict that it's going to be a brutally hot summer. But I'm just a cat, so what do I know?

A Clash of Kitties

My humans have become obsessed, my furry brothers and sisters, with a new TV show called "A Game of Thrones." They have been inviting people over every Sunday for the past three weeks to watch it! Now, I'm not usually a cat to turn down the opportunity to assert my authority over other living creatures, but we're talking a lot of humans here! You already know that I'm somewhat suspicious of strangers, but it just gets worse when there are 5 or six of them in the same room.

Not only do they make me suspicious, I think they are mocking me behind my back. For example, two Sundays ago, I had a hair-raising run-in with the TV stand in front of everyone. One of the doors on the TV stand was opened, and I felt it would be nice to use it to scratch the side of my face. The door swung in as I rubbed against it, then suddenly swung back out and startled me, causing me to jump and puff out my tail in fear. Now, I would have thought nothing of this, but everyone in the room burst into uproarious laughter. It was as if they were just waiting for me to do something ridiculous.

Anyway, going back to the original topic, "A Game of Thrones" is some nerdy fantasy series that my humans seem to enjoy. One of the main themes of it is that "winter is coming." In that vein, I thought I'd post a picture of myself braving the horrors of the Minnesota winter. It is technically spring here, but let's put things in perspective: just the other day as Evan and Sudha left for the work in the morning there were snow flakes falling from the sky! I've still been trying to escape recently whenever either of my servants opens one of the doors. But my efforts have been rather lackluster due to the cold.

However, the spring scene outside my windows is still very entertaining and engaging. These things called "leaves" have started blowing by the window, and blowing onto the deck. I'm not really sure what they are or where they come from, but they tend to yell insults at me as the blow by. I respond in kind, and try my best to get through the glass at them.

Leaves aren't the only thing that has returned with the springtime. The squirrels and rabbits are much more active these days, as well as the evil other cats from the neighborhood.

I don't know if you recall, but a nefarious usurper going by the name of Tuxedo spent some time trying to steal away my humans last year. He's back. Sudha spotted him out of the kitchen window, and both of the human help seemed to be pretty happy about it.

Just last night, however, another cat showed itself. I don't know this one's name, but she is much smaller and shyer than Tuxedo is. Sudha and Evan were in the living room after completing their serving duties, and I was by the back deck door. This cat, a darker tabby just got up on the deck and came over to the door. She just sat there! I puffed up my tail and scream and swiped at her, but she just stayed where she was, looking in through the window at me. Evan and Sudha came over to see what the commotion was. Once this intruder saw them she ran away.

What bothers me about this whole situation is that my humans seemed happy that there was some stranger hanging out on their porch. Now, I don't know where they get the idea that they have the right to decide who gets to stay on my porch, but it is MY porch. Just as this house is my house, and everything revolves around me.

That is all for this time, my furry brothers and sisters. I have to mentally prepare for another visit of rude humans this Sunday.

And End to Cuddling

Spring is finally back, my furry brothers and sisters. This means a lot of things to a creature of my staggering intelligence. First, it means that the birds have returned. With them, there is a lot more activity in the local population of woodland creatures. As such, starting around this time of year I become glued to the windows and completely ignore everything else that doesn't involve food.

Over the winter months I was quite cuddly. It gets cold here in Minnesota, and sitting on a nice warm lap is very comfortable. But now it's warmer, and there are creatures to fantasize about maiming, and I just don't need those warm laps any more. Evan and Sudha are a little disappointed by this, but they'll get over it.

Evan was sick with a stomach bug the other day, and to help him out, I completely ignored him and stared out the window instead. Sudha picked him up and put me on her lap and began scratching me behind the ears. I leaped off of her and ran back to the window.

I really don't think my humans understand.

The other thing that comes back with the Spring is my eagerness to escape. I still haven't been able to get out of the house since last summer, but that isn't to say I don't try my hardest. Yesterday Evan was on a phone call on the back deck. I made him almost completely tackle me when he came back in to prevent me from getting out. When Sudha went out to check the mail the other day, I was lying in wait!

The last thing that I love about spring is that it is the season where I can start spreading my delicious and pungent cat hairs over the entire house again. I find that clean, folded piles of laundry are the best suited for this purpose. So when I take my rare breaks from the window to nap, I try to find one of these to sleep on.

Now, if you will excuse me, I have to get back to all this!

Nooks and Crannies

Sleeping is a very important part of my life, my furry brothers and sisters. I have discovered some lovely little hiding places that offer great cat naps recently. Evan and Sudha had a dinner party the other night, and they put a lovely Syrian tablecloth on the table. This provides me with excellent cover to both perch and sleep on the dining room chairs. As they and their friends were sitting down to eat, I installed myself on one of the empty chairs, and stealthily swiped at their legs!

I'm also using it as a nice dark place to nap. They also have this butcher block in the dining room that is covered by a cloth as well. I've hollowed out a place for myself inside this lying on the pile of placements.

Sleeping is truly a wonderful thing.

Eating is also a very wonderful thing, and ever since I've been forcibly put onto my latest diet I've been devising new ways to procure food. I've already told you about my swiping and pouncing tactics with regards to my sleeping humans in the morning, those still work sometimes, but they've started locking me out of the room when I do that.

Another thing I tried was to physically claw my way into the cat food bag and gorge myself overnight. This was truly wonderful, but too obvious. They hid the bag in a cabinet in the kitchen where I can't get a hold of it.

So my current tactic is this: jumping up onto the kitchen counter every single time that I get the chance and attempt to lick the food off of any dirty dishes that might be in the sink. While not as reliable as ripping through the cat food bag, this one is pretty good. Evan and Sudha are unfortunately beginning to catch on and have been better about having the infernal spray bottle at hand to stop me.

Sudha has these delightful little plastic hair clips that she uses. They make the most satisfying noise when they are batted around the hard wood floor. I've recently started graduating to even non-plastic hair products. I ingested a rubber hair band the other day and then later regurgitated it onto the living room carpet. I may try that again in the future.

Well, It's starting to get every-so-slightly warmer outside. I need to be watchful for the return of the birds and the small woodland creatures that I can stalk from the window. Until next time!

The Frozen Northern Wastes

It has been a cold, snowy winter my furry brothers and sisters. Another 6 inches of snow dropped on us over the last couple of days, and there is now a prodigious amount of the stuff sitting on the ground. This morning the temperature was a balmy 1 degree Fahrenheit.

As I've mentioned before, this cold does not really sit well with me. I am a desert creature, originally. So I am starting to hang around my humans a lot more. They always seem happy when I use their laps as kitty-warmers, and sometimes they scratch me behind the ears in a process. And I assume I warm them up too. It's a win-win situation.

Last week I climbed into a pair of Evan's pants that was sitting on the floor and went to sleep. They were nice and warm. It was quite a shock for both of us when Evan went to put them on, however, so I may not repeat that.

I've also re-taken up the habit of lying spread-eagle on the floor and displaying my nether regions to everyone who might be interested. This always seems to get Evan and Sudha's attention.

Speaking of getting their attention: I'm still on my diet. I'm not sure why my silly humans haven't started feeding me a little more again, I've clearly lost weight! Sudha's friend Katie even told me I'd lost weight. Since Evan and Sudha don't seem to be getting the picture, I've started a campaign of complaining, swiping and pouncing that has no rival. It really is quite effective. Starting at about 6 am, I'll slink into their bedroom and swipe at anything that's exposed. They've gotten pretty good at hiding their hands and feet from me, so I've been working on my pouncing moves. I launch myself into the air and land heavily on top of anything that moves under the blanket. Now I'm not the bigget cat in the world, but let me tell you, when 10 pounds of feline lands on your leg or stomach in the middle of the night, it is definitely noticeable.

Yesterday Evan brought a big box home from work, made of real cardboard! It had lots of this strange stuff called "styrofoam" in it, and some other less important stuff. This styrofoam stuff is amazing! I spent a good half hour chewing on it. I came downstairs quite satisfied and with styrofoam crumbs all over my face.

I'm hoping that the weather will warm up soon so that the small woodland creatures that I like to stalk will come back. But until then, stay warm!

Turkey Fat and Ashes

I had a religious experience this weekend, my furry brothers and sisters. Evan cooked a couple of turkey burgers on his George Foreman grill. For those of you who are unfamiliar with this type of grill, it has a little plastic receptacle for the fat and/or juices to drip down. Evan very kindly left this receptacle out for me on the counter while he was eating his burgers. So naturally, I leaped up onto the counter and licked the whole this dry. It was so incredibly delicious and filling that I didn't have to eat until much later that day.

On the subject of eating, Evan dropped some egg on the floor on Saturday morning as he was making breakfast. Now, they usually give me a raw egg yolk every once in a while. But this was different. It was "cooked," whatever that means. I sniffed at it but was not interested in it at all. Evan seemed incredulous. I tried telling him it wasn't a big deal, it's ok for me to not like egg cooked in butter, even though I'm a cat. I think he's still confused about that.

When I was a kitten, I used to climb up the backs of chairs and perch precariously on them. I've always loved climbing, and chair backs provide a great vantage point over the other, lesser, beings in the household. I stopped doing that for a while, I'm not really sure why. But recently I've started the practice again. I try to climb up there as stealthily as possible, and then swipe at the backs of Evan and Sudha's heads as they are on their computers.You can see an example of this here on the left. As you can see, my human's office chairs have nice, soft backs, and are very comfortable to perch on.

I've been observing how my humans sleep lately. They tend to lie on the bed under the blanket. I, personally, have a nice thick fur coat, so I haven't needed to lie under anything to keep warm. However, I decided to try it last Sunday. I crawled under a corner of the covers on Evan and Sudha's bed and fell asleep there. I have to see it was indeed a pleasant experience. What was even more pleasing about it is that both of them freaked out when they couldn't find me! Evan accidentally almost sat on me, giving up my position, however.

Speaking of warmth. Evan and Sudha have been setting fires in this thing called the "fireplace" lately. I find this fireplace oddly fascinating. I sit there and stare at Evan while he's cleaning it out, and while he's setting it up. In fact, the other day, I went so far as to climb into the fireplace itself while he was cleaning it out. Unfortunately for my dignity, the humans tackled me and wipe off all my paws to prevent "sooty" footprints. The nerve of those lesser creatures sometimes.

It was an exciting couple of weeks, my friends, so until next time!