How to Train Your Kitty

I have discovered something new, my furry brothers and sisters: book shelves. This is not to say I didn't know about them before, I most certainly did! However, I have just recently discovered that they offer excellent nooks and crannies to hide in. Also, they offer great vantage points from which to survey your domain. They are not that easy to climb into, unfortunately. Evan and Sudha are completely baffled on how I was able to get in there. I cannot share the details as it is a cat secret. 

Needless to say, they thought it was "adorable" that I was on the bookshelf. I got them to take some pictures of me for the blog.

A few days ago, Sudha brought my old cat bed out from behind the couch and set it up for me close to the fireplace and right by a heating vent. I hadn't slept in this bed for months and months, not since moving to the new place, actually. But, oh boy, was that bed comfortable. I've started spending hours sleeping in it over the past few days. I've never experienced heating vents before, but I have to say that they are god's gift to kitties.

Speaking of kitties, that damned black and white cat named Tuxedo was back yesterday. I don't understand why he feels the need to come by be all friendly to Evan and Sudha. He's just making me look like a grouchy old thing! I took the liberty of hissing at him quite profusely through the deck door.

Now that the weather is colder, it seems that more bugs are coming into my house. These little beetles get in and fly around the place. Just last night, I stared at this one beetle for hours and is walked around the ceiling, tantalizingly out of my reach. I do catch them and eat them when I can. they are tasty little morsels!

Speaking of tastiness, my humans have gotten into the delightful habit of giving me egg yolks on the weekends when they are making their breakfast. I have to say, not only are these things juicy and delicious, they also make my beautiful fur coat softer and sleeker!

Now, every time Evan breaks an egg, I'm in the kitchen demanding that he provide me with one.

There have been many visitors to the house of the last few weeks. Some inspectors came to look at my new furnace yesterday, I used the opportunity to try to go outside for some fresh air. Evan didn't seem to like this very much and threw me back in.

Some friends of my humans came by last week and showed some mild interest in me. I like watching them from a safe distance, but I'm always there, keeping my eye on them!

Anyway, I'm late for a nap by the heating vent, until next time!

All the Leaves are Brown, and the Kitty is Gray/Orange

The season is changing, my furry brothers and sisters. It's getting colder and there are fewer and fewer woodland creatures for me to stalk. The squirrels seem to have stuck around, which I appreciate. As I mentioned in a previous post, I have become more cuddly with the advent of the cooler weather. In addition, I've unfortunately had to stop shedding as much, to conserve my silky winter coat.

The other day, Sudha and Evan came home from a walk talking about "Harriet's Twin." Apparently they saw some cat that they believed looked like me. Here are a couple of pictures of this "twin."

I'm not really sure where they see the resemblance, honestly. No cat could look like me really, I am truly unique, and one of a kind. The say I came from a litter of 6 or 7. Balderdash I say! I am angry at them for thinking that there could possibly be another cat like me. 

I'm angry at Evan for another reason too. On Monday, there were some people over installing a new furnace. Naturally, I was curious and kept following them around. I just wanted to follow them outside, I'm not sure what all the fuss is about. But Evan would have none of it, he unceremoniously grabbed me and locked me in the upstairs laundry room all day! I've never been so insulted in my life, that I can remember, at least. The details of that event become hazy as I move on to more important things, like plotting killing squirrels.

There were more people over at my house this weekend, for cheese fondue. Evan's cousin Jill was in town, and we had her, her brother John, Paul and Tara over. I only hissed one time, and Jill fully deserved it! She wouldn't leave me alone. I still did feel bad about that, so later I did come up and eat a couple delicious kitty treats out of her hand. 

For the last two nights, I slept on Evan's belly as he was lounging on the couch watching TV. I put my face down flat and I spread my front legs out as if I'm stretching. It's very comfy. And he seems to like it to, he rubs my back, and scratches me on the chin and under my collar. I'm slowly forgiving him for his earlier affronts.

Well, I have more squirrels to stalk. Until next time!

The Silence of the Kitties

It has been a long period of silence, my furry brothers and sisters. The season is changing, it's getting colder and darker outside. Evan doesn't seem to mind the weather getting colder. Sudha really doesn't like it though. Personally, I like it. The winter is a time where I can lie on my back, spread-eagle towards the fire. Or where I can lounge about on top of the heating vents. I've heard from other cats that these heating vents are very comfortable. They haven't even been turned on around me yet, but Evan and Sudha are getting me a new furnace, so I'm excited to try them out.

Speaking of other cats: there is a neighbor of mine who has no respect for personal boundaries. A black and white cat, by the name of Tuxedo, showed up a couple of weeks ago on the front porch and stood there for over an hour, meowing to get in. Now, you would think this is normal behavior, but Tuxedo apparently doesn't understand that this is my house! He can't come over here, acting all friendly, and expect my humans to pay attention to him. Needless to say, I hissed at him quite vehemently. Sudha thought it was "funny," but she doesn't understand the seriousness of the situation.

Ever since that incident, I've been acting more friendly. I figured I would try to top this Tuxedo every way I knew how. I've been sleeping in Evan and Sudha's laps, I've even stopped hissing at visitors!

Just last week, my humans had some other humans over for dinner. The dinner consisted of some sort of delicious smelling melted-cheese dish. I was very excited to help them eat it, but they wouldn't let me! Anyway, I hung around with the whole group for most of the night. I didn't get too close, but I sat and watched them from halfway across the room.

Later on, under the influence of several bottles of wine, two of the humans attempted to bribe me to come closer. Now, I would say that this normally works, however, the two humans in question, Seth and Fernando were trying to coax me with pieces of bread. Needless to say, being a bloodthirsty, violent carnivore, I had no interest at all in this. I sat there and stared at them. I tried to tell them that the bottle of kitty treats was just over on the mantle piece, but they didn't seem to understand.

Yesterday, Sudha's friend Pooja and her family were over for breakfast, and I actually ate treats out of their hands. Not one hiss or raised hackle. I must say, I'm quite proud of my behavior.

I've taken quite an interest in the lovely Syrian tablecloth that Evan and Sudha got from Evan's parents. It's long and easy to grip with my claws! I love to dash across the living room, leap up onto the table and then let myself fall off the other side while gripping the table cloth. I recommend that you all try it.

Anyway, I must back to chewing on Sudha's plants!

The Remains of the Kitten

When I was a kitten, my furry brothers and sisters, I was very cute, very cuddly and very friendly. Back in those days I lived in a carefree world filled with laps and toys. Back then I would howl whenever Evan or Sudha went outside or left me along downstairs. I would sit on their friends' laps.

I was a very different kitty. After enduring a hard move I'm much more crotchety. I'm working on it though. Evan informs me that I have a reputation for hissing and being unfriendly.

So this weekend I made more of an effort. Evan just turned 28 years old last Friday, and on Saturday he had a bunch of people over to celebrate this! I behaved very well. I stayed downstairs and watched people. I didn't hiss at anyone at all during the party. Even some of the guests tried to pet me. Their friend Ben used kitty treats to try to win me over. Mmmmmmm.... kitty treats.

Evan was a little under the weather a day after the party so I sat on his lap a couple times to cheer him up. He scratches me very nicely behind the ears, and on the back of my neck under my skull and crossbones collar.

Sudha and Evan have this lovely purple Syrian table cloth on the dining room table. I don't know what it is about this table cloth, but it calls to me. It contrasts so beautifully with the lighter color of my fur. So naturally, I can't resist jumping onto it and spreading out all over it. I do this especially when they are not at home. I think they may be on to me though, as the thing is covered with cat hair. And I was slow and Sudha caught me sitting on the table last night.

Both of my humans were out of town a week ago, visiting Sudha's family in Chicago. Their friend Fernando, who is staying in the basement, was there, along with his girlfriend Rachel. They fed me decently well, I suppose. Although they basically ignored me. It was a little disappointing. I am a creature with very complex feelings. Just because I seem to be completely ignoring you and treating you with utter disdain and contempt, that doesn't mean that you have the right to do the same. Needless to say, I was happy when Sudha and Evan got back that Monday. I showed my appreciation by complaining for food and ignoring them.

The weather is getting colder. I feel that it will soon be time to lie on my back with my legs spread towards the fireplace. There will be fewer woodland creatures to gaze at from the window with murderous intent.

Until next time my furry brothers and sisters!

Meat, Screens and Flame

Yesterday, my furry brothers and sisters, I spent several hours watching an amusing spectacle. Evan and Fernando spent quite some time assembling the new grill that they brought home. Let me tell you that these two humans have quite some inflated view of their own "manliness." I spent the first half of the time begging for them to let me out and help them, but to no avail. I meowed and meowed at the screen door at the top of my lungs to be let out, but they wouldn't do it. In fact, Fernando started using the other door instead.

The did finally get the thing set up. And then the most wonderful thing happened. Evan opened up this package containing raw brats and I thought I was in heaven. I've never encountered that sensational smell before. I meowed quite loudly and repeatedly, demanding that Evan give me some of it, but he refused. I really need to sit these humans down and remind them who the boss is here.

To vent my frustration, I dug my claws into the screen windows and doors over and over again. Now there are marks in the screen where my claws have done their work. In addition, I've rubbed my nose all over the big window in the living room, now it has cart markings all over it.

It has thankfully cooled down here. It has been very hot and humid, I've been shedding like crazy over everything. This is something that I do normally, but especially when it's hot. But yesterday the crazy humidity finally broke, and Evan and Sudha opened up all the windows. It was glorious to be able to plan the death of every passing bird, squirrel and rabbit.

Other than Evan's refusal to let me eat his brats, I've been appreciating my humans a lot more. I've been enjoying sitting on their laps and allowing them to scratch me behind the ears. It really is quite comfortable. The other night Evan was lying on the couch reading, he apparently was having trouble sleeping. Which is strange, I don't understand how you could have trouble sleeping. But I digress. He was reading on the couch and then turned off the light to try to fall asleep, and I climbed onto his lap and on the blanket in his lap. I think that I personally helped him fall asleep. He sleepily scratched me behind the ears and then rested his hand on my back as he dozed off.

Well, they've gone to work again for the day. I have a lot of things to do, so I must be off!

Spicy Marinade for Kitty Kabobs

As I was perusing the internet this morning on Sudha's computer, my furry brothers and sisters, a very disturbing article attracted my attention. You may read it here if you wish: Kitty Marinade. The summarized version is that a cat was found and rescued out of the trunk of some guys car. The kicker is: the cat was marinating in oils and spices, with the purpose of becoming his human's next meal!

Now, I don't have to tell you all how disturbing this is to me, as a cat. Unlike cows, sheep, pigs and chickens, we serve a purpose outside of being served in steak and kabob format. We are cute, hilariously funny, and have the uncanny ability to exert our will and desires upon the lesser species while at the same time convincing them that they love us. I am opposed to eating the flesh of animals unless I kill it myself or it is served to me by my humans. Please, don't eat cats!

Speaking of humorous human behavior: Sudha still insists on buying flowers at the farmer's market every weekend and then displaying them in a place where I can very easily access them. Occasionally she'll complain about it to Evan, but really, what does she expect? I love ripping those colorful little buds off, chewing them up and discarding them in strategic places around the house. There's something about it that I can't resist. And yet, they keep bringing them home, expecting me to cut it out one of these days.

They brought home this devilish contraption the other day. It appears to be a mouse that is attached to a string. It makes the most pathetic squeaking noise whenever it moves, so it much still be alive. As you know, cats are pretty good at chasing and killing mice, so I have been chasing this thing around for days now. I never seem to be able to catch it, but it's still alive and squeaking at me!

I mentioned a few posts back about my addiction to the nip. Well, that is still going strong, I'm somewhat ashamed to say. I have resorted to stealing the drug from Sudha's purse because I can't resist it any more. I had noticed the lovely and attractive smell of the catnip wafting from the direction of the couch. I stuck my nose into every corner, searching for the source, and at last I found it! I shoved my whole head into the purse and yanked out the delightful catnip filled, chipmunk-shaped toy. And let me tell you... this was the good stuff.

Evan and Sudha's friend, Fernando, has moved in with me on a temporary basis. He's moving to Chicago eventually but is currently residing in the scary basement that I still dislike going into. He doesn't pay that much attention to me, he claims to hate cats. But I happen to know that he belongs to an adorable little cat named Bonnie. I think maybe she is just a little too protective and has insisted that he pretend to dislike all other cats. I really don't mind him much as long as he stays in the basement. The smell doesn't quite reach all the way up from there.

As an update: Suma Setty has made it safely to India, I miss biting her already...

Until next time my furry brothers and sisters!

Farewell and Good Woodland Creature Hunting

I am writing today, my furry brothers and sisters, to wave a fond farewell to Sudha's little sister, Suma. You can see her in the picture, I was skyping with her yesterday evening.

Suma and lived and stayed in my house off and on for the past few years. I know she says she doesn't particularly like me or my sharp teeth and retractable claws, but I think she's just saying that and really does enjoy my company.

Suma is leaving to work in India and won't be back for a whole year. Sudha and Evan are quite sad about this, but also are extremely proud and happy for her that she is taking advantage of this wonderful opportunity.

I will have to find someone else's feet to pounce on for a year, so I am particularly put out.

Please give Suma your best wishes!

She will be missed. As much as humans can be missed, that is.